So here is the idea. Corn has come up with the most clever evolutionary strategy ever-- find a powerful species, and dupe it into wiping out the rainforest(competition) and planting corn everywhere. The same way that a flower exploits a bee with its cleverly evolved biomechanisms, corn is exploiting us. Its taking over the world.
I think I am going to have to adapt my own strategy of global domination in light of this new information. I will cryo-freeze my brain for a thousand years, thaw out in 3009 when corn has become our benevolent overlords, then reintroduce global warming until the temperature raises to the point where all the kernels pop and butter-flavored-topping rains from the sky. I haven't worked out how that last bit will happen.
How, you ask, will I be able to withstand such sweltering temperatures? Easy, I will do like Jean Claude Van-Damme did in universal soldier and chill in a tub of ice for six hours a day, lazily sipping at a banana daiquiri and daydreaming about Lost. Plus my new, year-3009, bionic-robo-super-body will totally have air conditioning and stuff.

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