‎63 Years of Memories....

‎63 Years of Memories....
that's what I have now. The photo below shows the chair on the point which for so many years was my father's favorite after-supper place to contemplate and cast for walleye. As much as I feel guilty about what's happened, I know he would understand and even say there's nothing to forgive. He lived life fully and moved on many times. I'm the one with the unique experience of being attached to a beautiful place for my whole life. And despite all my best efforts, yesterday the 'cabin' was sold. I signed the papers and, truth be told, a weight was lifted. A new life lies ahead without the obligations, but with all of the wonderful memories. My unrelentingly positive attitude says this is truly how it is, but my heart is still sad.

There are some things in life for which the balance between the obligation and the joy of ownership often cannot be sustained forever. It became clear that I was no longer up to the task of taking care of the place quite a while back. However, knowing what needs to be done and doing it are often far apart. Finally, no choice was left. It had to be sold.

Now it's gone. No more worrying about how long the grass or how deep the snow is up there. No more sublimely pleasurable early morning cups of coffee sitting on the dock when the color of the lake is like pale blue glass and the air is completely still. No more endless repairs, high taxes, and utility bills. No more late nights around the fire pit with friends and family - warm from both fire and friendship. No more frozen pipes or emergency calls to the furnace guys. No more saunas and midnight skinny dipping that make you feel like you'll live forever while your connection with nature is confirmed by the gazillion stars of the milky way and the loons calling out in the dark. No more concerns with low well water levels or water so hard and full of iron the clothes turn yellow and your newly washed hair feels like brillo. No more finding the way home by boat in the dark after a long day on the lake feeling like this is the only place you really, really belong. No more praying that the boathouse will make it another year without collapsing. And ultimately, no more making new memories with friends, family and loved ones. No new memories, that is, at Half Bay, Lake Vermilion, Tower, MN. New life... here we come!

How do you thank a place for memories?

Tuesday, May 30, 2006

More



So here is a wierd one. I live in an air conditioned(thank god) metal box. The walls are hot in exactly the same way that a frosty mug of Yuenling lager isn't. Alot of people have gloves that they use to drive because the steering wheel can burn your sweaty little paws.

We have been rocketed alot recently. We had one attack with six rockets in one night. Evidently, there are alot of really tired people here because it seems like I am the only one who doesn't sleep through the blasts. Since we pretty much spend the rest of the night in the bunker, I usually just nestle into the coziest spot I can find in the gravel and try to catch a few ZZZs. Sleep is good. Once I am in the bunker I can sleep like a baby. You guys wake up with pillow marks on your face; I wake up all dusty with gravel marks on my face.

If you guys have never seen the movie "Jarhead" you should watch it. I don't particularly relate to the character in that movie because he is a marine in a war a thousand mile from here fifteen years ago. It is evident that the movie makers have at least seen the desert by the cinematography though. How the camera lens flares in the sun is a similar sensation to the "snowblind" white light that you see when you stumble into the sun for the first time. I go to work in the darkness and come home at about sunset. Some days I am indoors untill the sun is out and the first time each day that you see a sun this bright... hits you like a locomotive.

The tarmac is so hot you feel it with ever sense. You can taste the heat clinging to your skin, you can smell the swelter idly swirling around you. It is so hot you can almost hear the concrete hissing under your melting boot soles.

I think this is what the planet Mercury is like... No water, no life, 450 degress in the sun.

I will try to keep up on writting a little bit more.

Lots of love and sunblock
-Bert

1 comment:

Lottie Dah said...

Here I am with the questions again :)
Where is the bunker? Does everyone go there? Is it underground? Or a reinforced building? Good thing you can sleep wherever! It's funny that 'rockets' always used to evoke patriotic thoughts ...rockets red glare...4th of July...space exploration...etc...But when you write about rockets it's a whole 'nother story!
Glad you have a bunker to go to.
Hugs and Love, Mom.